Motivational Monday 9.22.14: Terrain Complain

You know what sucks?

Physics.





It would be very, very nice if it was self-evident that you maintained the same pace at all points during your run.

Instead, you end up accidentally going to fast on the way down the hill (it's pretty darn inconvenient), and then slowing down when you get to flat ground (that's the easy part), and then feeling like you're trying to scale a cliff when you have to go back up the hill (kill me now).

Oh, yeah, and while I'm complaining, has anyone else had the whole 'not-being-able-to-breathe' problem? Like, It really starts to hurt, and I get panicked, and then I can't breathe, and then thinking about the fact that I can't breathe just makes it harder to breathe, and it is an altogether unpleasant experience.

Advice would be appreciated.

(P.S. Coming next week: an analysis of my horrific running attire (but this time it's new))

Okay.

Goodbye.

Allons-y!

Post-Script:
Wait a minute, are there people who actually read this rubbish?

That's weird to think about.

But at any rate,

Thursday Complaints 9.18.14: Rad Outfit

It's Complaint Thursday again. Brace yourselves.

Note: I own no running clothes whatsoever. Hence, the very strange, ugly, and atypical outfit that you see on my body.


Pre-Run Griping:



Midpoint Pain:

Post-Run Misery:

















Allons-y!

Motivational Monday 9.8.14: Lady Problems

Note: If you're a dude, this is not gonna be very applicable, but not particularly graphic, either. You just might not care.

Hello, internet-friends.

This week, there was a complication.

I started my cycle.

It happens, it happens. It is most definitely not pleasant, but infinitely less so when you have to go on a run.

Not, I'll start with saying that I do not have characteristically unpleasant periods. Usually, they're pretty mild. I don't get very sick, or get a lot of cramps, or other unpleasant things that other women have more of a problem with. The worst thing that usually happens to me is that I always get two or three zits directly on the tip of my nose. But that's it.

But this week, I had to go on a run. I forgot about the whole cycle thing until I was already running, or else I would have pleaded 'lady time' and my dad might not have made me go. But I didn't. So five minutes into the run, my abdomen exploded with pain.

Cramps. Cramps is what happened. Cramps. Bloody, bloody cramps. Awful, movement-incapacitating cramps. I literally could not run. So I hobbled to my regular turning point, and hobbled back.

I'll have you know, as well, that the cramps did not go away for the entire rest of the bloody day. I hardly moved, because every time I even twitched, pain stabbed through my gut.

Moral of the story: Never, ever, ever, ever run while on your cycle. Ever. Unless…well, no. Nothing short of the TARDIS landing in my yard could cause me to do that again.

Of course, in case of TARDIS, I might be on my cycle, have two broken legs, a sprained ankle, the flu, a headache, and have been shot several times, and I would still sprint for it. But, c'est la vie.

That's all for today.

Goodbye.

Allons-y!